Tuesday, 14 June 2011

Mister Rhys Mystery, Case #1: The Bristol Hum

It's not just a name, you see?

So, appropriately, I've decided to solve the age-old mystery of the Bristol Hum. That mystery being: what is the Bristol Hum? It's a hum that people hear in Bristol. But what is it?!

Well, it began in the 60s, around about the time a lot of people were taking drugs, but that's neither here nor there, unless you think it is. A lot of people couldn't hear it and still can't. I never have, and I have been in and around the place for seven years. And I can still hear the Mosquito, so I have very youthful (you could even say handsome) ears. Anyway, it drove a lot of people to distraction and was blamed for a lot of preciousness-like symptoms (insomnia, headaches, nosebleeds, death).

So some people thought The Hum was aliens, and others thought it was traffic (you'd think), and some thought it was mass hallucination. The cure that was actually prescribed for those who could hear it... a TIN FOIL HAT!

So you'll probably get these 'scientists' who think that tin foil hats 'don't cure The Hum' or what have you, but it sounds pretty sensible, doesn't it? You know, something something radio waves something something BLOCK IT OUT? Yeah, the 60s were awesome.

Anyway, cut to the 2000s and some guy comes up with some kind of psychological reasoning behind it. Basically something along the lines of how we [people who hear The Hum, not me - I only hear things that exist] are opening our ear holes up to too much ambient noise with our minds and the cure is... psychotherapy and relaxation...? Sounds pretty cuckoo to me! Like, if you trusted what that qualified professional had to say, then maybe your cat's brain wouldn't be safe.

So maybe this is because I only recently saw X-Men: First Class and it made me love the 60s more, and maybe it's because the next film I want to see is Super 8 and I think aliens are cool, but as far as I'm concerned the conclusions are obvious.

Aliens did it! In the 60s!


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